1. The Cinderella Principle. Meeting the right person by Right positioning i.e. becoming Mr and Miss Right. Everyone of us has a glass slipper in hand with which we measure and evaluate people as we meet them. We have expectations and desires which we expect our future spouse to meet. And so does that future spouse. If we develop ourselves, we would find that some prince charming will come knocking on our doors very soon.
  1. Laws of attraction

Like attracts like – spirit

Opposites attract – soul (temperament)

Complement each other – physical

All three must be present for a glorious marriage.

This implies that you need to know the person. Love at first sight is seeing a body and falling in love with it. You only fell in love with one third of that person.

  1. Character assessment
  2. How does the person handle money?
  3. How does the person handle people of the same gender as you in his/her family or circle of friends?
  • Who are his or her friends?
  1. How does the person respond to authority?
  2. How does he or she handle tough situations?

Also apply this to yourself.



Know your God.

Know yourself.

Know your spouse.

  1. List of constants and variables and what God has to say about them. Make a note of the things you want in your spouse no matter how minute it might be, or how unspiritual that feature is. God put in you a desire for certain things so whatever you do write down will not be a surprise to Him. After that, talk to Him about it and let Him advise you. You’d be pleasantly surprised at how understanding and romantic God is.
  1. Counsellors


There are four recommended categories of counselors:

  1. People of your age and phase in life, most likely friends.
  2. Young couples with good marriages and godly testimonies. Good for planning weddings and dealing with issues that affect couples in your day.
  • Elderly figures. They help to remind us of old core values and principles.
  1. Spiritual counselors. Keep us grounded and accountable.

A common questions is “When do I tell my pastor?” It is best you do so before you ask or give your answer. If this answer is unacceptable to you, then your relationship with your pastor is incomplete.


Pro 11:14 Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.

See Part 1…

Go to Part 3…



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