Here are the notes I took as I read the book of Esther on January 2, 2005. It is another prospective study and so reflects the thoughts that swam in my mind at that time as a read. I have shared them untouched. Hopefully, they will of use to you as they were to me. Again, I did not include the verses of scripture in the post just so that I would not end up copying the entire book.
1:12. Why did she refuse to come?
If only someone had warned her that spurning her husband’s whimsical request or order, as it is more likely to have been, would drop her from the majestic position to that of a non-entity, maybe she would have obeyed. But apparently, at the time of the King’s order, there was no law against such an action. It was her action that brought up the necessity of the law (1:19-20); obedience and respect had been natural up to this point in time.
I guess it is the nature of fallen man to stop doing right when it becomes inconvenient when there is no law to prevent it.
Maybe she got upset by the thought that she was summoned not because her presence was desired by her husband but because he, in his stupor, just wanted to show her off for the sake of her beauty. I wonder why she was upset. She’s part of the “show off” culture; she held her own banquet while the king held his, probably for the same reason (1:9) so I don’t think it was new to her to be shown off like that. She probably used to enjoy it at one time. Probably she was half drunk too. Either way, the Book of Proverbs is right, “wine is a mocker, strong drink causes brawling.”
If she had honoured her husband she would not have suffered the wrath of her King and become the lab rat or scape goat for launching a new law. Every man’s wife is his queen, no matter how small his kingdom; even if his throne is just a “special chair” in front of the TV in the sitting room. Honour him, even if just for his humour or ego trip.
Anyway, a man always wants to be proud of his wife’s beauty!
1:9. What makes a woman “worthy” however is not her beauty but her respect, at least the show of it, for her husband.