Question

Why do people find it hard to say, “I am a Christian” or “I believe in Jesus” when they are in front of a camera or an audience outside of church?

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Hey Doc!: Vaginal Swelling

Q:

Please sir,what is the cause of swollen vagina during menstruation,ovulation and after sex? Thanks

A:

Okay.

Let me attempt, first, to correct the question so we can give correct answers.

The vagina is not that opening in between a woman’s legs guarded on both sides by some folds of skin. Those are the Labia. There is a a pair of regular skin folds, one on each side called the Labia Majora. Just under the cover of the majora are the Labia Minora. These are made of a softer type of tissue. The “tube” after the minora is what is called the Vagina by doctors. The vagina itself does not swell although it gets more lubrication from increased fluids during intercourse and child birth.
So, I suspect you are referring to the Labia Majora and Minora which together form the Vulva or Vaginal orifice.

Yes, they do swell up under various circumstances as a normal body response. But all of it is based on fluid accumulation inside the labia. This facilitates intercourse, without it, sex is painful. During ovulation and for some, during menstruation as well, fluid builds up in the body and leads to certain parts feeling fuller or looking swollen such as the breasts, the nipples (making them a little painful) and the labial folds. Once the event is past, fluid regresses and everything assumes the usual size and shape.

This process is very normal.

20-20 kindness

Some acts of kindness touch you in a deep unforgettable way, filling you with hope that there is good in life and that things will get better.
Can’t forget such hope even if I forget the acts that birthed it.

At the point of the act, a “thank you” is expected and when it does come, the weight never goes beyond the act because even the recipient sees little beyond the immediate act.

But with time, and our typical 20-20 hind sight, we come to appreciate that the act was just a token but the impact was the real objective.

Now, from this point of view, when the recipient says “thank you” it is gratitude for the impact, it has a whole lot more weight and this time both the weight and the gratitude are unexpected pleasant surprises for the channel of the initial act who, by this, is encouraged to keep going.

The benefit of 20-20 hindsight on acts of kindness multiplies the value of the act.
Let’s keep doing the little good we can, it changes lives.

Q & A with Dr Linda

I am a lady of 25yrs, not in relationship and sometimes I will just be feeling emotional loneliness to the length that it seems as if I should just start any relationship I see around me.
To pray or study the word of God at that time will be difficult for me.
Ma, please what can I do?

Answer
It is not strange to feel this way at all especially when people around you are getting into relationships.
However, it also shows that your focus is on the wrong thing.
Relationship is not the peak of life. It is not the best thing in life either. There are other things in life that are more important that you should focus on.
The best thing or most important thing in life after God is YOU.
Focus on you.
Focus on how to improve you and enjoy you.
The single period of a person’s life is not the time to sit around and wait for a relationship or get lonely. It is a time to work.
Adam was created by God and was single at first. God did not allow him to just sit down in the garden waiting for Eve. God gave him work.
Adam was alone but not lonely because he had God and work.
If you are getting lonely, then you are missing both.
God is with you so interact with him.
Get involved in work.
What kind of work? You may ask.
It is the work of building yourself spiritually, mentally and physically.
Read books that will make positive impact in your spirit, read books that will expand your mind, face your physical job and you will notice that you will be too busy to feel lonely.
If you jump into any relationship because of loneliness, I can assure you that you will be making a big mistake.
Relationships don’t cure loneliness and will only fuel it if that is your reason for going into it.
Nobody in this world has your time 24/7 except God which makes him the only cure for loneliness.

Lovers’ Quarrel

Q: I usually get into arguments with my fiance almost everytime. This gets me wondering if the marriage will work out in the future. What can be done sir so that we won’t always be in conflict?

A:

Disagreements are of two basic types.

1. Violation of Personal principles

2. Violation of Generally accepted principles.

These two can usually be resolved with mutual education and support for each other.

This is very different from a scenario where no matter which way you go, major disagreements come up. It means one, or both of you, is a disagreeable person.

The church word we use for such people is contentious.

The Bible says to avoid such a person.

Prov 21:19 [It is] better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.

And when an argument gets to the point of contention, no truth is being communicated. Biblical example tells me to just let the person be.

1Cor 11:16 But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God.

So, you have to check which category your disagreements fall into and from there, you can work your way forward or smartly pull out of the relationship.

Do not ignore warning signs.

Q & A with Dr Linda

Question

How can I help control the anger of my partner? If I do talk to her she always misunderstands all my talks. We fight over small issues. How can this be resolved?

Answer.
The first thing here is that both of you are not communicating. Both are talking but no communication hence the misunderstanding.
I would advise that you take a different approach to communicating.
Next time you have an issue, look for a time when you can talk to her calmly and she can receive you the same way. If things start getting heated up, postpone the discussion and let her know that both of you or she is too angry to continue.
The second issue is that you cannot control another person’s anger. You do not have control over another person”s emotions. You can stir it up but not control it. It is up to her to be able to take steps to control her emotions.
The best way to take control over anger is God’s word. The word has the power you need to overcome it and grow to the extent that you can choose not to get angry in annoying situations. It is called being spirit controlled. The control is entirely up to her.
You can also encourage her to take
these steps.
If she is not interested in working on her anger, then I would advise you to reconsider the relationship.
A person easily given to anger is usually out of control and is unpredictable.
Prov 21:19
It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and angry woman.
Prov 22:24
Make no friendship with an angry man;and a furious man,thou shalt not go.
Prov 29:22.
An angry man stirreth up strife,and a furious man aboundeth in transgression .

Hey Doc!: Cysts, Fibroids and Conception

Q: What is the difference between ovarian cysts and fibroids?

A: Difference between Ovarian Cysts and Fibroids.

The cysts occur in the ovaries. They are small bags of fluids created usually by normal processes in the ovary and they often are harmless. Fibroids, on the other hand are solid masses that grow within or on the uterus.

Depending on their location, fibroids can cause pain, heavy menstrual flow, difficulties associated with sustaining a pregnancy, difficult deliveries or might impact on nearby structures in the abdomen if it is “hanging” outside the uterus.

If you feel a firm bulge in your tummy that is not due to pregnancy, please see your doctor. Let him at least examine you to rule out fibroids.

Q: Can one conceive, like be pregnant in spite of ovarian cysts in the womb?

A: It’s called ovarian cyst because it occurs in the ovaries. It cannot be in the womb. Ovarian cysts do not grow in the womb.

The common ovarian cysts are harmless, most of them resolve on their own and only require monitoring but there are no advantages to having a cyst. In some cases, there is significant pain and some grow large enough to require simple drainage.

Cysts do not prevent conception in any way. They are on in ovaries, conception takes place in the part of the uterus called the fallopian tubes and the fetus grows on the inside of the uterus.

The only form of cysts that prevent pregnancy that quickly comes to mind is not the common type that I have just described and is a definite clinical entity associated with multiple cysts in the ovary.

A combination of complaints like excessive weight and poor blood sugar control in this case in addition to difficulty in conception would make a gynaecologist suspect Polycystic Ovary Disease and he would request a scan and other tests to confirm. Remember, infertility is not directly caused by excess weight, excess sugar, or many of the things commonly circulated in gists we tend to love listening to.

If you suspect something is going on in your body that you don’t like, you can see your doctor or gynaecologist. You can also take charge of it by the faith you have in Christ Jesus.