In-laws of Pressure Cooker

Q:

I am in a relationship with a lady I love quite well. But her family is very demanding and it’s affecting our relationship. What can I do?

A:

Hallelujah!
Demands are many and varied o, and the implications vary as well. There are demands made as part of the bride price and wedding protocols.

However, anything beyond this is inappropriate. You are not yet a husband so responsibilities of husbands are not yet yours to bear.

Just as I would expect that your girl might cook for you once in a while and help you clean house once in a while, to demand that of her when she is not yet your wife is stepping out of bounds.

So, my counsel is not to quarrel your way out of this. Talk to your girl along these lines I just shared with you. She should be made to see how these demands are out of place and becoming a burden. She might be able to make her folks pipe down or she could step it down if she is the one bringing their problems to you.

If, however, they insist on pressuring you to meet their family needs, understand that things will not improve with time and will only escalate with marriage. If you’re not ready for that pressure, end it.

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