Question from VALCINNATION:
A married lady still loves her childhood boyfriend and calls him to express her love hoping for a romantic relationship. The childhood boyfriend wants their friendship to be casual. Is it proper to keep her as a casual friend for the sake of their former love and still avoid intimacy?
We appreciate your question and thank you for trusting us.
The answer to your question is summed up in the scriptures below.
Prov 5:1 My son, attend unto my wisdom, [and] bow thine ear to my understanding:
Prov 5:2 That thou mayest regard discretion, and [that] thy lips may keep knowledge.
Prov 5:3 For the lips of a strange woman drop [as] an honeycomb, and her mouth [is] smoother than oil:
Prov 5:4 But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword.
Prov 5:5 Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.
Prov 5:6 Lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life, her ways are moveable, [that] thou canst not know [them].
Prov 5:7 Hear me now therefore, O ye children, and depart not from the words of my mouth.
Prov 5:8 Remove thy way far from her, and come not nigh the door of her house:
Prov 5:9 Lest thou give thine honour unto others, and thy years unto the cruel:
Prov 5:10 Lest strangers be filled with thy wealth; and thy labours [be] in the house of a stranger;
Prov 5:11 And thou mourn at the last, when thy flesh and thy body are consumed,
Prov 5:12 And say, How have I hated instruction, and my heart despised reproof;
Prov 5:13 And have not obeyed the voice of my teachers, nor inclined mine ear to them that instructed me!
Prov 6:23 For the commandment [is] a lamp; and the law [is] light; and reproofs of instruction [are] the way of life:
Prov 6:24 To keep thee from the evil woman, from the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman.
Prov 6:25 Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids.
Prov 6:26 For by means of a whorish woman [a man is brought] to a piece of bread: and the adulteress will hunt for the precious life.
Prov 6:27 Can a man take fire in his bosom, and his clothes not be burned?
Prov 6:28 Can one go upon hot coals, and his feet not be burned?
Prov 6:29 So he that goeth in to his neighbour’s wife; whosoever toucheth her shall not be innocent.
Prov 6:30 [Men] do not despise a thief, if he steal to satisfy his soul when he is hungry;
Prov 6:31 But [if] he be found, he shall restore sevenfold; he shall give all the substance of his house.
Prov 6:32 [But] whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he [that] doeth it destroyeth his own soul.
Prov 6:33 A wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away.
Prov 6:34 For jealousy [is] the rage of a man: therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance.
Prov 6:35 He will not regard any ransom; neither will he rest content, though thou givest many gifts.
From all these, you will see that there is nothing to benefit from either having an affair with her or even keeping her close as a casual friend.
She is nothing but a trap who will steal and destroy your life (her lips drip honey as described by the bible and she is already calling to profess her love but the after taste will be bitter). If you have ever tasted any sweet thing that has a bitter after taste, you will agree that once the sweet substance enters your mouth, you cannot escape the bitter after taste. It is as sure as dawn and dusk.
Prov 9:16 Whoso [is] simple, let him turn in hither: and [as for] him that wanteth understanding, she saith to him,
Prov 9:17 Stolen waters are sweet, and bread [eaten] in secret is pleasant.
Prov 9:18 But he knoweth not that the dead [are] there; [and that] her guests [are] in the depths of hell.
Keeping her as a casual friend is as dangerous as dating her because she will oppress your mind and so harass you sexually until you succumb. Nothing good can come out of adultery. The bible says adultery will reduce you to a loaf of bread and you will lose your precious life.
You can’t set your centre table on fire and you sit down in the house, lock the doors for safety and act as if all is well neither will you invite a wild lion into your house and not expect to be eaten by it when it is hungry.
Another thing you need to note is that whatever you do is a seed and the harvest is always greater than the seed planted.
If you go into a married woman today, know that you have set the stage for your own misfortune when you do get married.
Finally, I will repeat again that you run away from this woman and trust God for a woman who is yours to claim.
For UNLIMITED by Dr Linda Oyanna