Q: Sir, What do you think?
A: I’m married … my wife is married. So the proper question is what do you think?
Q: Pastor Daniel naaaaaaaa … Lolzzzzz. Was hoping u would just give me ur opinion.
A: What would you do if you were in this position.
Q: I grew up in a home were we had excess and slowly got to where we had nothing. I honestly don’t have much respect for money, despite wat it can do, I am more interested in how smart he is, than how full his pocket is.
Besides the question says “Currently Earning” 🙃
A: Ok. Then. The question is answered.
I summarily agree with you.
Q: 🙄 😀 yes sir … Lolzzzzz
Majority of ladies including my sisters think opposite, their reason is the current economic change. So I started wondering….. If maybe times have changed.
A: Times change but wisdom does not change.
Currently earning meagre pay does not make someone a meagre person. Many, if not all, of the success stories in the world today had humble and rough beginnings. Even the Apostle Paul, the most documented of the Apostles, was in prison while writing those letters for which he is now famous through eternity.
One issue is to ask yourself if you can see this person beyond his current pay check. No matter how good it is, it is a pay check and anything can happen at anytime to make the pay check stop coming. Like in Nigeria, for some of us, the pay check did not stop coming but the economic situation cut the value of our earnings in half.
Realise this as a fact, nobody starts with his dream job. Even if he’s in business, the initial earnings are always a far cry from the projections that might have been the motivation to begin the business in the first place. Nothing starts at the top, except the grave.
Second issue is to ask yourself if the person sees himself beyond his current pay check. If he has a plan for his life that transcends his current circumstances, then his own security is not in his job but in himself and his vision. If the vision is from God, and he is actively pursuing it, then you can be sure he will succeed no matter the odds.
It is this security that you, as a woman, should be looking for. Does he lose himself because he has lost his job? When his pocket is empty, does his life feel empty to him, and then to you? These last questions define the line between guys and girls whose relationships revolve around money and materials as separate from those whose lives revolve around the person they claim they are in love with.
This brings me to the next issue, that of being the reason for your presence in his life. Of course he should have the material means to take care of you at the level you’re willing to allow. If he doesn’t have it, it’s either you will walk out or he would so that is not even the issue. The issue is this, you’re there to be his helper.
I must say with sincerity and gravity, if you’re not in a person’s life to be a help to him or her, you shouldn’t be there at all. If the man you have the hots for does not need your help, he does not need you period. Why do I say this?
You would recall that in the beginning before the woman was created, there were two major words used to describe her purpose, thereby justifying the necessity of her creation. They were “companion” and “suitable helper.”
Gen 2:18 And the Lord God said, [It is] not good that the man should be alone (or without a companion); I will make him an help meet (or suited) for him.
“If purpose is not known,”
… say it with me … “abuse is inevitable.” If you lose focus of the reason you’re in his life, you will abuse his life and yours.
I know we want to argue that the man is supposed to also help the woman, I have nothing against that. But, if at the very beginning God created the *woman* to be a companion though life and a helper with assignments, then it cannot be ignored that, both in fact and in principle, you are there to help him.
And if you’re looking at the meagre resources the man currently has access to and what comes to your mind is insecurity rather than something you can multiply and make to increase, then your capacity to see is seriously compromised.
You are a life giver, sure, as a Christian, yes, but even more so as a Christian woman. You are a multiplier, a builder, a wonder worker even in the natural; I am yet to meet a man who is not awed by the process of birth. Yet women do this almost routinely.
The womb in your body is a physical reminder of the womb in your spirit. As a woman, you will take a single sperm cell and effortlessly provide the environment for it to be grown into a complete bodied and totally unique, previously unseen, human individual.
These are reminders that your presence in a man’s life is to provide an environment where his dreams can safely grow into something you can be proud of.
So, if you see a man earning little and you run away because of the little, you have missed the opportunity to be a partner with God in the making of something great. It also means that all those confessions you make in church and the declarations your minister makes over you actually mean nothing to you beyond the noise. I say this because if you claim to believe the word of God over your life, why do you think the word that the low income earning man is currently believing will not come to pass.
Should not the brother also be asking questions about your capacity to bear children? I guess you would expect him to believe that you can, right? Interestingly, even to your own self, you have no proof that you can bear children. All you have to go on are the seeds of your menstrual flow which come monthly and your faith. Same applies to him, if he has a small unnoticeable monthly seed in his hand and faith in his heart, does he not deserve to be believed in?
No matter what we can see now, our future is different from our present. If it’s bad, it can become good and if it’s good, it can become great.
2Cor 4:18 … we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen [are] temporal; but the things which are not seen [are] eternal.
Job 8:7 Though thy beginning was small, yet thy latter end should greatly increase.
1Tim 6:6 But godliness with contentment is great gain.
Your insecurity in God will produce insecurity in man and your insecurity with your chosen man is a sign that you are not yet secure in your relationship with God.